My Grandmother, my sister and my niece 

Found this lovely #blastfromthepast photo of my grandmother Hannah, my sister Kerrie and my niece Mia which I love. It was probably taken in the seventies up in Rowlands Gill, Tyne and Wear where they lived. Sadly Hannah and Kerrie have passed away now but MIA still lives in Rowlands Gill and we Remain very close X 

(2016 With MIA in Newcastle) 

My beautiful sister x x

As I’m packing up to ship out I found this rare photo of my beloved sister Kerrie holding my niece Mia with our grandmother Hannah looking on. Kerrie and I were very close and although it’s been two years since she passed (01/04/12) I still grieve for her.

When I saw her in the hospital her consultant said she was very ill but in no immediate danger; he suggested she would still have another year. That was on the Wednesday (I think) and as I was booked to fly out to India on the Saturday I boarded my flight. Readers will know I lived in India for a long time and still have very strong connections there; it had been two years since we’d been back and I was so looking forward to going and seeing everyone again.

When we arrived our place (Bananaville) was exactly as we had left it; bags of rice in the cupboard, an open pack of cigarettes on the sideboard. It was almost as though time had stood still and so good to be ‘home’; over the weekend we caught up with a few of our closest friends.

On the Monday I had just about got over my jet lag when the phone went and I could see it was a UK call. I went out onto the balcony to take the call and sat in a basket seat. Kerrie’s partner Stuart was in tears and I knew before he spoke that I had lost my beloved sister. I can’t describe how I felt and still cant; even if I could I don’t want to.

At Kerrie’s service I sang the Fields of Athenrye for her at her request. Stuart was inconsolable and told me he didn’t think he could go on. He phoned me often from Kerrie’s mobile, sometimes in the middle of the night, which I found so distressing because Kerrie’s photo came up as the caller on my phone. Within six months he too passed away. His heart had broken.

Photos such as this one are so treasured for me; sometimes that’s all you have.

Her body has left this world, but her soul is still very much watched over by me

I lost my beautiful sister on 1 April 2012. It was particularly painful for me as I was thousands of miles away in India at the time. I’d seen her a few days before I left the UK and doctors told me that although she had a terminal illness she would live at least another twelve months. She lived another five days.

In India I found myself taking long walks along very long beaches as a way of trying to come to terms with my loss and in some ways I’m thankful I had that time. Even though I was angry with the doctors I’ve always felt very spiritual in India and over about three weeks I was blessed with many opportunities to reflect.

As with most people who have lost someone I suppose I clue into those special dates as a way of remembering my sister and feeling close to her again even if it is just for a short while. Today (19 November) is her birthday and I wanted not just to acknowledge her but also remind myself that she is still very much an important part of my life. Her body has left this world, but her soul is still very much watched over by me. My love for her never dies, quite the contrary x x x

For my Kerrie with love

In memory of my beautiful sister Kerrie who left this world one year ago today and who is always in my heart. The pain of losing her never leaves me , sometimes I feel as though my arm has been ripped off. Thankfully the Lord blessed me with an ability to create and store images in my mind and so she is never far away from me. Thank you Lord. I love you Kerrie. Brother Alan x


Stuart Wilson

Sadly back in April I lost my sister to a very aggressive cancer, it was all over in a few weeks. She like me had had a difficult start in life and as adults we both became dependent on alcohol. At 40 I stopped drinking following major surgery but my sister remained dependent. As a consequence her life hadn’t been easy.

About twelve years ago she met a man who was to become the love of her life and although drinking featured in their lives they were very close and had a relationship full of love. When my sister died he was devastated and could barely cope with waking up in the mornings. He’d call me several times a day regardless of the time partly I think because in talking to me he felt some closeness to my sister. Of my three sisters Kerrie was the closest to me mentally and I can’t deny feeling a dreadful loss when she died. I was in India at the time she passed away and felt quite helpless and gutted.

At the funeral Stuart was almost manic with pain and told me that he and Kerrie had made a pact. Sadly yesterday I had a call from my niece Mia who told me they had found Stuart dead in his house although no other details are available yet.

I write this post as a tribute to a wonderful man, Stuart Wilson, who gave my sister twelve happy years at the end of her life. I know things weren’t easy for him either but it didn’t stop him loving and caring unconditionally for Kerrie and that alone gives me so much peace. Thank you Stuart.